Helen's Corner

My name is Helen Stone and I am a deaconess at Trinity Covenant Church. This scripture has defined the last ten years of my life. Someone once described me as the "church mom". I am a wife and mother (to many more children than just my own), counselor, social worker -- but most of all, I am a child of the King, the King of Kings our Lord Jesus Christ.

We are called to allow the creativity God has placed within each one of to create along side of Him healing paths for our feet and then to walk along side and encourage others as they find their way in this wonderful gift of life. Helen's Corner may be many things in the future but for now, it will simply be notes from my journal. A journal filled with prayers and thoughts showing some of the ways Jesus has taught me to walk in His paths.

I invite you to share these prayers and thoughts with me, and feel free to send an email if you are touched by my writings.

July 15, 2008

July 11, 2008

Good morning Lord Jesus, the stars shone brightly at Your birth and angels sang and danced. You came suffering all the indignities and mysteries of mankind. A babe growing within His mother's womb, a Son born in a stable. So seemingly unprotected and yet all heaven rejoiced at His birth. Your Father, the Lord over all that is seen and unseen whispered news of Your coming for hundreds of years. And yet, none of us can see the Truth embedded within the Living Word of Life without the Holy Spirit revealing Your heart and plans. We children of dust lose the sense of our Abba Father's presence in a heartbeat with a careless thought. But You, my Savior were all God and man. Your Father's presence must have been as true and real as Your breath and the very ground You walked upon. Please Lord Jesus I long know the presence of Your heartbeat within me. Please fill me with Your Holy Spirit to overflowing. So that the words of my mouth and the meditations of my heart will reveal Your love, mercy and grace and not the narrowness of my heart. Please grant me the gift of repentance so that I may walk in Your holiness all the days of my life.

8For once you were darkness, but now you are light in the Lord; walk as children of Light [lead the lives of those native-born to the Light].
9For the fruit (the effect, the product) of the Light or the Spirit [consists] in every form of kindly goodness, uprightness of heart, and trueness of life.
Ephesians 5:8-9

April 24, 2007

Praise the Lord of all creation. Let His Name be praised.

"Yahweh, let my words come to Your ears, spare a thought for my sighs." "I say this prayer to You, Yahweh, for at daybreak You listen for my voice; and at dawn I hold myself in readiness for You, I watch for You."

Psalm 5:1,3

Lord God, we beseech You as Your children to sanctify our hearts, so our hearts and souls will be worthy of Your call. We are called to be priests of the Most High King, the Lord of heaven and earth, to live within Your Presence, following Your vision every moment of every day. We are able to do this because of Your gift of life. For as Stephan Lawhead writes "To be alive to the wonder of the commonplace," I thought that is the very gift of a wildly generous Creator, who invites His creatures to contemplate the exuberance of His excellent handiwork. There is a deep and abiding joy at work in this worlds-realm, and we who toil through our lives do often forget this, or overlook it. But look: it is all around! Ceaseless, unrelenting, certain as sunrise, and constant as the rhythm of a heart beat." With this vision we become priests, who can bring our Abba's vision, hope, mercy, healing, grace and abundant love to the world around us. We become more than priests, we become healers and ambassadors for the Most High King of heaven..

Then the call of the warrior comes upon us. For new lives must be protected from the devourer of this world. The Word must go forth, that freedom is possible for every man, woman and child created by our loving Abba. This Word, our Lord Jesus Christ redeems and sanctifies, and we are called to bring His Word and Life into every nook and cranny of the earth. At times this call is daunting and overwhelming, it seems impossible with all the world, the flesh and the devil rising up against it. But a man "can doubt, can nurse great misgivings, and yet uphold his vow though his heart is no longer in it. This, I believe, is the spirit's highest consummation holding fast to faith by dint of will alone when the fire of certainty has grown cold. For when the fire-wind of ardor gusts high, even the weakest soul can fly. But when the fire dies and the wind fails, the real test of a soul's worth begins. Those who persevere though all things gain strength and find great favor with God." (Stephan Lawhead)

There are times in all of our lives when we are pushed to the very limit of our strength and faith. The cost to our lives to bring forth the Kingdom of God seems more than we can bear. Our Abba Father and King of kings is always ready to sustain and nurture us, for our lives and well-being are safe within His hands.

April 5, 2007

Good evening Lord, You are magnificent, mighty beyond all words, thoughts or dreams. And yet, dearest Abba You are also home to my fragile heart. You hold me with Your loving arms and my heart and soul melt into Your intimate embrace as you enfold my life within Yours. Dear Lord Jesus, my best friend and hope of my life and dreams, I long to feel Your breath on my skin as You breathed upon Your disciples. Jesus repeated His greeting:

"Peace to you. Just as the Father sent me, I send you." Then He took a deep breath and breathed into them. "Receive the Holy Spirit". John 20:21-22

Sometimes in my soul and heart, I have sense of Your breath, Your touch and I am comforted, to the depths of my soul and the tips of my toes. Then and then only, does my heart know true rest, peace and sleep,

"In peace I lie down, and fall asleep at once, since You alone, Yahweh, make me rest secure." Psalm 4:8

April 3, 2007

Dearest Abba, You are the Holy of holies. All life flows from Your heart and returns once again to You. Please Lord hold me, I know that my days are like the wild flowers of the field here today and gone tomorrow. Yet, sometimes tomorrow seems too distant. Somehow, without words or images, my true homes calls me, sings to me of Light, Love, Hope and Peace. Hope and faith are my tethers to this world and the next. Lord Jesus please soothe my homesickness, give me vision to live here victoriously, at one with you in each breath I take. I am tired of the fight to hold on. I need You, Your love, Your consistency in my life. Thank you my dearest Abba.

February 25, 2007

As for the man who is a weak believer, welcome him [into your fellowship], but not to criticize his opinions or pass judgment on his scruples or to perplex him with discussions.

Romans 14:1 Amplified Bible

Lord Jesus, how many have I hurt with my thoughtless and sinful words and actions?

Dearest Abba Father, You who created the magnificent night sky with a thought or maybe a dream. Dearest Lord, You rule the night and the vast oceans with the gift of the moon. Darkness or denial can't hide me from Your abundant love, from Your nurturing care, from Your mercy and grace. Thank You my Abba for forgiving my many sins. Please continue to open my eyes and heart, so my sin is ever before me. Grant me the gift of repentance, so I may turn from hurting You and all those around me, who are the treasure of Your heart. Please dearest Jesus, teach me to weed the treacherous, deceitful thoughts within my mind and heart. Let not one action or word flow from my mouth and body birthed from those sinful patterns within me.

Dearest Jesus, You died on the Cross, rose that awesome Easter morn to give me access to Your Abba. Now I may seek repentance, ask forgiveness and walk in Your God-given light throughout my days and nights. This would all be too much for us to hope for, a miracle beyond man's imagination but then You went even further. Our Abba Father called You home (to Your home and our true home), so that the Holy Spirit could capture our repentant and broken hearts and souls. Please Holy Spirit fall on us now as You did that first Pentecost in the upper room. Let us walk and speak of Jesus, His Abba and the Word of God with love, power, mercy and grace. Holy Spirit, we cannot do this without Your life within us, sanctifying us, redeeming our lives for the dream of living as one with our Dearest Lord.
 

December 20, 2006

Isaiah 9: 1-7

The people that walked in darkness
Has seen a great light;
On those who live in a land of deep shadow
A light has shone.
You have made their gladness greater,
You have made their joy increase;
They rejoice in Your Presence
As men rejoice at harvest time,
As men are happy when they are dividing the spoils.
For the yoke was weighing on him,
The bar across his shoulders,
The rod on his oppressor,
These You break as on the day of Midian.
For all the footgear of battle,
Every cloak rolled in blood,
Is burned,
And consumed by fire.
For there is a Child born for us,
A Son given to us
And dominion is laid on His shoulders;
And this is the Name they give Him:
Wonder Counselor, Mighty God,
Eternal Father, Prince of Peace.
Wide is His dominion
In a peace that has no end,
For the throne of David
And for His royal power, which He establishes and makes secure
In justice and integrity.
From this time onward and for ever,
The jealous love of Yahweh Sabaoth will do this.

 

Dearest Lord of the heavens, Creator of all things dreamed of and everything beyond our imaginations. You are King of kings and Lord of lords. You are jealous for my heart. You have brought me out of the land of shadow into the glorious Light. You risked all by sending Your Beloved Son Jesus Christ to earth to reveal Your merciful, gracious and abundantly loving Heart; now You are asking me to lay down the idols of my mind and heart at the foot of the Cross. You are asking me to risk losing the fragments of safety and freedom they bring me for the Hope of true safety and freedom. I am scared Lord. This is a deeper level of faith, hope and trust. My mind and heart are desperately afraid of failing You. But Your Word assures me that no one gives up anything for the Kingdom without gaining much more within the Kingdom.

Please Lord Jesus give me hope, patience, wisdom and strength. The season of war is long over. But for too long I treated myself as the priests of the time of Jeremiah, when he says, "They dress my people's wounds without concern: "Peace, peace!" they say, but there is no peace." (Jeremiah 6:14 and 8:11) My faith in You, my King, my Savior, my Best Friend and in Your awesome and relentless love has been and continues to be strong. Lord Jesus, we stood in the days, months and years of battle (and I learned not to whine, at least too much). But when it was over, I neglected the injuries to my mind, heart and soul. I covered them with band aids and held onto idols to give me comfort. The season for idols is over Father, my Abba, You sent Jesus to be my Comfort, my Healer. Lord Jesus You are the revealer of the wounds of the past, present and future, please give me and those who love me the wisdom to find and clean out the unhealed wounds that lie within me. That I may walk and live knowing a truer safety and freedom then I have ever dreamed of.

Lord Jesus, it is more than being healed, it is learning how to live. Abba Father, I was created in Your image and created to be Helen. Teach me Lord what that means. You have promised in Isaiah 32, that Your peace will reign in my home. Please allow this peace to rule in my heart and home, by Your mercy and grace. I love You, my dearest Abba Father.

In the wilderness justice will come to live
And integrity in the fertile land,
Integrity will bring peace,
Justice give lasting security.
My people will live in a peaceful home,
In safe houses,
In quiet dwellings
--the forest shall by beaten down and the city laid low.
Happy will you be, sowing by every stream,
Letting ox and donkey roam free.

Isaiah 32:16-20
 

May 4, 2006

Good evening Lord of the heavens!! I love you, thank you for this day. I have been reading Journey of Desire by John Eldredge, and in answering the work book questions I can feel You speaking to me, Lord.

I am the lost artist searching for the tools and gifts my Abba placed within me, around me. I am Papa’s girl, made in the image of the Awesome Father-Creator of the universe with abilities and talents hidden under busyness, MS, fatigue and stuff, the never ending stuff. Maybe this is why (or in reality one of the reasons why), I want to ditch everything and live at the church. Stuff takes over my life and keeps me from my dreams, my small thoughts and ideas. I realize that I have siphoned off so much energy from my dreams, that I cannot call them passions anymore, merely emotional thoughts. 

I guess I have known for a long time that I have been called to write. Fear and procrastination have siphoned of time and energy, precious energy. Lord, John Eldredge's book could not have happened at a better time, a better place.

Lord, I need Your hope and faith (and what do hope and faith make, over time and under pressure—TRUST).  It is interesting how everything works around, and awesome that not a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, nor a hearts cry is lost or unimportant in the Kingdom of our Lord. I feel like the floodgates have opened and that I am not lost, I just do not know exactly where I am or where I am going. But, my Abba Father, Creator King, You know and You are more than willing to reveal this path, this life, this call to me one step at a time. I love You.  

Show me Your ways
That I may walk with You
Show me Your ways
I put my hope in You
The cry of my heart
Is to love You more
To live with the touch of Your hand
Stronger each day
Show me Your ways

© Russell Fragar
1995 Hillsong Publishing

(Admin. in U.S. & Canada by Integrity's Hosanna! Music)

  April 27, 2006     Creating Healing Paths

Good evening Lord, thank you for Your mercy. Please Lord, help me to love You more and more each day.  I love You Lord of the heavens. You are the most precious dream though out my days and nights. Please heal me Lord, let me walk in freedom, keep the MS far from me and let me live in freedom. I love You.

Lord, thank you for bringing that woman to my window today. Please minister to her, touch her with Your love and mercy, and help me to love her just as she is. Let her see that her peace and growth come from You and not her surroundings; geographical 'cures' fix nothing.

Lord, Your Word is my life’s bread. Thank you for Your Word for me today,

“In simple humility, let our Gardener, God, landscape you with the Word, making a salvation-garden of your life.”                    (James 1:21b, The Message)

How cool is that? Yet, it takes time and work to turn a forest into a garden. And in some ways it takes just as much time to restore an overgrown garden into a place where new life can thrive. At our old house there was an old kitchen garden, long over-grown; there were certain weeds whose underground root system was so well established that in ten years we never rid the garden completely of them. Certain years they were worse in some areas, other years in different ones.

Isn’t that like our spiritual walk with our Lord?  Things crop up in the oddest places, problems and attitudes we thought long dead raise their scheming thoughts at the most inopportune time.  For our Abba Father to work in our hearts we must let Him in and give the Holy Spirit room to work by spending time in prayer, contemplation, and prayerfully reading the Bible.  Please my Abba Father, create in me a new heart and guard that heart against the weeds and brambles with Your mighty love.

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March 11, 2006

Good morning Lord of the heavens, Ruler and Creator of the universe. I love You so much. You are everything to me. Please help me to accomplish Your work this day. Help me not to be lost in my own worries, anxieties and concerns, and to see Your presence in my day.

There is a quote from Edward Farrell’s book Prayer is a Hunger and it resonates within my soul. It clearly identifies the primary obstacles in my prayer and everyday life:

 “...three main obstacles to trust are amnesia, inertia and 'mañana'. We are all subject to forgetfulness of God’s faithfulness in the past, laziness to act on the divine promise, and postponing until tomorrow what Jesus is asking of us today: childlike abandonment in trust.”

I do so easily forget the blessings and gifts that God has given me thus far. When I see the pressures, bills and concerns of the day, I am afraid. Just as in the Gospels, when the apostles were rowing across the see of Galilee. They were discouraged by the wind and storm that fought against them hour after hour. I wish I knew how Jesus expected them to think and act. Would singing to one another in Psalms and fellowshipping over the miracle of the loaves and the fishes been enough to hold back the wind?  Would it been enough to remove the feeling of being overwhelmed by the task before them? Did they at that time have the power to command the storm to stop in the Name of the Lord Jesus Christ? I am not sure.

But for me in this day it is sufficient for me to remember my Abba Father’s faithfulness, to walk with Christ in this gift of life, He has blessed me with. And to remember that some how, some way the Lord of the universe truly does love us each best of all.

March 8, 2006

“The saint never knows the joy of the Lord in spite of tribulation, but because of it…. The experiences of life, terrible or not, are impotent to touch the love of God, which is in Jesus Christ our Lord.”  -- Oswald Chambers

Good morning Lord of the heavens, I praise Your Name now and forever. Thank You for Your faithfulness, even though I am so often faithless. Please Lord, lead and guide me through this day and fill my heart and mind with Your Holy Spirit, please Lord, fill me with Your love Mercy and grace. Help me Lord to be fulfilled in You, to find the strength for my day in You. And to love with Your precious love those men and women You put into my life this day. Lord, please forgive all of my wrong attitudes and help me respect and love my family more and more each day. Please be here for me. Lord, I am lost without You and am continually aware of the desperate need within me for Your nurturing Presence in my life. Thank You for Your love.

March 7, 2006 

Good morning Lord of the heavens. I love You so much. You are Ruler of the universe and the most majestic dream of my heart. Please help me this day to accomplish Your purposes, to walk in Your path, to love and respect those You love.

Lord, I need Your help. I cannot be the woman, the Helen You have made without You. You created me and only through You can I be me. Your gifts of salvation, love, mercy and grace are what sets my heart and life free. Help me Lord to walk in Your freedom. Help me to love those who You love, to have the energy and passion to walk along side of them. I want the people of God to know that they are loved.

Thank You for Pastor Thom’s sermon on the desert. We find out if our hearts truly belong to our Lord when we are in the desert. It helped me to see my life and this Christian walk I live more clearly. Living for Him and within His heart requires more than not sinning, church on Sundays (and maybe Wednesdays) and behaving as a "cultural Christian". The desert lays things bare and we are either nurtured by manna from heaven, or sustained by that same manna which through our irritability and complaints has become dry, tasteless protein bars for our souls. Our irritability and grumbling cause us to search for God in the future, when our troubles will be resolved (to our prerequisites), instead of seeing our Lord Jesus sitting next to us, holding out to us the Living Water (the Holy Spirit) for our parched souls.

Please Lord help us to see our Savior in the midst of our desert seasons.

O God, You are my God,  earnestly I seek You; 

My soul thirsts for You,  my body longs for You,
In a dry and weary land where there is no water.
 

I have seen You in the sanctuary

and I beheld Your power and Your glory.

Because Your love is better than life,

my lips will glorify You.

 

                            -- Psalm 63:1-3

March 6, 2006 

Good Morning Lord of the heavens and King of my heart. I love You so much and I am sorry for my sins, my sins of selfishness and pride. Please forgive me, cleanse me and lead me to Your Heart.  I am sorry that I am lost in worries and concerns that I get irritable in a moments time. This is a desert season of my life and I lost here without You by my side. I long to love You more and more each day. Please help me Lord to love You more and more, to see Your Presence in my life and in my days.

You bring my thoughts back to the river on that windy day a short while ago. The river by my apartment is a beautiful haven of wildlife and nature in the middle of the city, with majestic trees, old stone walls, birds and ducks. The river flows through town on its way to the sea, ever moving with a constant force and quiet strength. But there are stormy days when it moves with a fierceness and wild power to its final home, the sea.

Our days are like that. We are constantly moving toward our destination with our Lord Jesus Christ. Heaven is the glorious finish of this pilgrimage on earth. This windy day on the river, the river seems to churn wildly, without purpose, although I know which way the river flows. And I know which way my life flows. The strength of the wind made the river look like it was flowing in the wrong direction. The entire time I watched, the wind whipped into the water, and the surface of the water with it wild whitecaps seemed to be going in the wrong direction. But I knew it was an illusion. The force of the fifty miles an hour winds were affecting only the surface of the water.

Then the Lord reminded me that our lives often look that way.  The intensity of circumstances in our lives make it look like everything is wrong and backwards. But the underlying strength of the river, the force of the current within us is still moving toward the ocean. We are still moving toward heaven. 

Our Lord’s love and passion for us is stronger than the wildness of our days.

       Place Me like a seal over your heart,
       like a seal on your arm;
       for love is as strong as death,
       its jealousy unyielding as the grave. 
       It burns like blazing fire,
       like a mighty flame.

       Many waters cannot quench love;
       rivers cannot wash it away.

                    -- Song of Solomon 8:6-7a
 

January 28, 2006

Good Morning, Lord of the heavens! Thank you for being in my life. Your are too beautiful and majestic for my heart to bear or even comprehend.

I see You here this morning watching and waiting for my heart and mind to turn to You, to worship You and sit still at Your alter. I wait for Your touch, to be filled with Your Holy Spirit, to begin this new day. All glory, honor and praise to Your Name!

Thank you, my Abba Father, for caring for my life enough to sacrifice Your only begotten Son, our Lord Christ Jesus, to set me free from sin and bondage. Truly, we do live as slaves on this earth without Your gift of life. We are tied to the earth, to the material things around us, to school, jobs, paying bills, running errands and such. But when we join with You, we see the world through Your eyes. We see the majesty of the sky, the finite but almost infinite power of the sun, and the treasure of Your heart, the beloved men and women You carefully place within our lives.

C.S. Lewis once wrote,

"There are no ordinary people. You have never talked to a mere mortal. Nations, cultures, arts, civilizations - these are mortal, and their life is to ours as the life of a gnat. But it is immortals whom we joke with, work with, marry, snub and exploit."

All around us are men and women, created and birthed through the Father Creator's heart, who will spend eternity in His awesome Presence, or will be lost to Him in a never ending dark night to the soul. Help us to journey along side of them revealing in our own small way the path to the Father's heart.

When I see my life through my Father's eyes, the consuming mundane things of this world lose their power to steal my joy and heart. I am then free to live and walk this life and journey with passion, the path which You created for me before the beginning of time.

From the moment You opened up my eyes

I've seen the world in a different light

From the dawn to the setting sun

I am overwhelmed by all that You have done

Jesus I adore You

And I lay my life before You, O Lord

"Adore" - © 2000 Dayspring Music, LLC (B. Bourgeois, C. Eaton)

"... For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future. Then you will call upon Me and come and pray to Me, and I will listen to you. You will seek Me and find Me, when you seek Me with all of your heart. I will be found by you," declares the Lord, "and will bring you back from captivity."   -- Jeremiah 29:11-14a

January 25, 2006

Dearest Lord, You are my hope and future, You are my life.  You fill my life with Your presence and I am whole and secure within Your heart. I love You, my Abba Father, creator of the this world, stars and the universe.

You are the Father Creator of life itself. We live in Your presence, moment by moment, breath by breath, You are more real then the ground we walk on. When we do not feel Your presence in our lives, still You are there. We do not need to be mindful of You, Lord, for Your eye to be on us and Your Holy Spirit to guard our days. When we turn our hearts toward You and whisper thanks to You for the sun, moon and stars, our world begins to make sense and we see Your life, energy and beauty in the vastness of the universe. Then we are reminded that the One who created the stars, the ocean, and the sky also created our hearts. Our hearts and lives are more precious to Him than the majestic orchestra of the waxing and waning moon and the awesome ocean tides. We all were once a twinkle in His eye, a thought, a dream within the heart of our Lord. Then He knit us together within our mother's womb and brought us into this world under the watchful eye of His angels.

Where can I go from Your Spirit? Where can I flee from Your presence?  If I go up to the heavens, You are there;  I make my bed in the depths, You are there.  If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there Your hand will guide me, Your right hand will hold me fast....For You created my inmost being;  You knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise You because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;  Your works are wonderful, I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from You when I was made in the secret place.  When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, Your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in Your book before one of them came to be.    Psalm 139:7-10, 9-16

January 10, 2006

Good morning Lord of the universe, I love You so much! Lord, I am grateful for Your Holy Word, I am grateful that You have given us words in the Psalms for our prayers and thoughts. Now mornings are welcome, even on those days of physical, emotional and spiritual fogginess, for I may read the Psalms aloud to You and center my thoughts around You, my Abba Father.

The Morning Prayer of King David

 

Yahweh, let my words come to Your ears

Spare a thought for my sighs,

Listen to my cry for help,

My King and my God!

I say this prayer to You, Yahweh,

for at daybreak You listen for my voice;

and at dawn I hold myself in readiness for You,

I watch for You.

You are not a God who is pleased with wickedness,

You have no room for the wicked;

Boasters collapse

under Your scrutiny.

You hate all evil men,

liars You destroy;

murderers and frauds

Yahweh detests.

But, I so great is Your love,

may come to Your house,

and before Your holy Temple bow down

in reverence to You.

Yahweh, lead me in the path of Your righteousness,

for there are men lying in wait for me;

make Your way plain before me.

Not a word from their lips can be trusted,

deep within them lies ruin,

their throats are yawning graves;

they make their tongues so smooth!

Pronounce them guilty, God

make their intrigues their own downfall!

Hound them for their countless crimes,

since they have rebelled against You.

But joy for all who take shelter in You,

endless shouts of Joy!

Since You protect them, they exult in You,

those who love Your name.

It is You who bless the virtuous man, Yahweh;

Your favor is like a shield covering Him.

 

                -- Psalm 5 (New Jerusalem Bible)

As I pray these words in the morning, they center me, and prepare me for the day. These words remind me to be continuously aware of Your Presence, to pray to be renewed with the Holy Spirit. I remember that there are liars in my life; whether it is people or circumstances tearing me down, or my own thoughts turning on me. Then, I can recognize and rebuke these lies, no longer living under their deceit.

Lord Jesus, help me to be faithful and mindful of these prayers, too often I still live under the weight of circumstance, anxiety and fear. Abba Father, I love You. You are the center of this vast, wide and brilliantly living universe and my heart.

"Sing words and tunes of the Psalms and hymns when you are together, and go on singing and chanting to the Lord in your hearts, so that always and everywhere you are giving thanks to God who is our Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ." 

                                                                                            -- Ephesians 5:19-20 (New Jerusalem Bible)

January 9, 2006

Good morning Lord of the heavens, my King and my Lord! You alone are the dream of my heart and rest for my soul, I long to love and serve You completely, without reservation. Help me, Lord to reveal You to my children, my family and every one I meet this day.

When men and women are hired to work in a new country often they are given a course in language immersion. During that course all they hear and are allowed to speak is that new language. It helps them to understand and respond to words that only days before were incomprehensible to them.

It would be awesome to have an immersion course in the Word of God. Then when we see and interact with the world around us, we respond with the words of life living within our hearts and souls. As ambassadors for the Living God, our Lord Jesus, we would respond to the world not with dry memorized words and trite phrases, but with Holy and Living Words that, have become knit within the fabric of our being, our soul and thoughts.

Abba Father, let me honor You with my lips and my actions. Please Lord, teach me to pray, to sit still in Your presence, and to be immersed in Your Word. Holy Spirit, help me to understand and respond to those Holy Words that are incomprehensible to the world, and to teach the language of grace and salvation in all that I say and do.

January 5, 2006

Good morning Lord of the heavens, I love You, Lord Jesus. You are my Savior and Best Friend, without You I am lost and alone. Lord Jesus, You alone faced the Cross, died and were raised from the dead to create a place for me within Your heart, to heal me and forgive all my sins, both great and small. Thank You Lord Jesus, Abba Father, and to you, precious Holy Spirit! All praise to the Triune God of the universe who sits upon the throne of heaven. Thank You, my Lord God.

Thank You for this new year, and for new beginnings. As I was praying this weekend, I believe Jesus told me to pray for a word for Trinity Covenant Church, and the word I believe Christ revealed me were to “Invest and Build”. I think I was expecting something more spiritually minded, like “pray”. Then I begin praying for a scripture that described the image in my mind. This begins to reveal some of what the Lord is saying to us for this upcoming year.

"So clean house! Make a clean sweep of malice and pretense, envy and hurtful talk. You’ve had a taste of God. Now, like infants at the breast, drink deep of God’s pure kindness. Then you’ll grow up mature and whole in God. Welcome to the living Stone, the source of life. The workmen took one look and threw it out; God set it in the place of honor.

Present yourselves as building stones for the construction of a sanctuary vibrant with life, in which you’ll serve as holy priests offering Christ-approved lives up to God. The Scriptures provide precedent: Look! I’m setting a stone in Zion, a cornerstone in the place of honor. Whoever trusts in this stone as a foundation will never have a cause to regret it. To you who trust him, he’s a Stone to be proud of, but to those who refuse to trust him, the stone the workmen threw out is now the chief foundation stone. For the untrusting it’s …a stone to trip over, a boulder blocking the way. They trip and fall because they refuse to obey, just as predicted.

But you are the ones chosen by God, chosen for the high calling of priestly work, chosen to be a holy people, God’s instruments to do his work and speak out for him, to tell others of the night and day difference he made for you-from nothing to something, from rejected to accepted. Friends, this world is not your home, so don’t make yourselves cozy in it. Don’t indulge your ego at the expense of your soul. Live an exemplary life among the natives so that your actions will refute their prejudices. Then they’ll be won over to God’s side and be there to join in the celebration when he arrives."     

1 Peter 2: 1-12 (The Message)

On Sunday when I spoke about these words, "Invest and Build", and read this scripture, I began to see the far reaching implications of the word given to us.

Our church building is beautiful, a gift from God, a place of worship, and a sanctuary for many, but we, this congregation, this church family are the living stones that create this vibrant sanctuary. Together we are the vibrant and living sanctuary (or sacred dwelling place) of our Lord Jesus Christ, our Abba Father and the Holy Spirit.

We are called to invest into one another, to build and support one another, to invest our time and passion into the people that our Lord brings into our lives. Ever mindful that each person we meet is one of Christ’s beloved and that our Abba Father created them to be loved by us. When we clean our own homes and our lives; physically, spiritually and emotionally we have more time and energy to love with extravagantly those who Christ loves. When we remember that we are mere pilgrims on this earth then we are free to devote our body, our mind, heart and soul to extending Christ’s Kingdom on earth.

Lord God, I pray that we would embrace this vision, that we would see our investment in each other as a precious treasure, with our reward and the return on our investment coming from You alone.  I pray that you would help us to build, to lay the plumb line straight, to lay a lasting foundation upon which generations will live and grow and prosper as we worship the only true Living Stone.  Lord Jesus, be our foundation, be our Rock, be our treasure, passed from generation to generation.

December 15, 2005

Good morning, Lord of the heavens -- Your light, Your life within me sustains me in ways I cannot even begin to explain. Thank You for Your presence here, thank You for the Bible, Your Living Word, let it truly be a light to my feet and the heavenly manna (food) that nourishes and refreshes my soul, mind and spirit. Thank You for our book study of “Ruthless Trust” by Brennan Manning, which has opened my heart and blessed my walk with You.

I realized this morning that I have a lost the gift of gratefulness You had so richly blessed me with for so long. I see pockets or moments of gratefulness within me, within my day, but it is no longer within the fiber of my being or continuous within the moments of my day. I look at the circumstances of my life and have bought into the belief that my life is hard, and I get angry and allow myself to grumble and complain about the difficulty of it all.

I want to praise You when I feel blessed beyond measure and to praise You when the days grow dark and tedious. Please Lord, renew the gifts or gratitude and repentance within me. Please Lord, give me discernment to recognize my sin, the grace to repent, and the strength to turn from my sin. Let it be that I am forever set free from my sins, for whom Christ has set free, is free indeed. Let me walk in that truth, hold it dear to my heart. Dear Abba Father, let me walk in freedom and lead others into freedom.

This entry was made during Labor Day weekend. We were house sitting for some friends of ours, taking a break from the chaos of packing. The house we have been renting for the last ten years is being incorporated into a housing development. And although we have known this was coming for the last few years, the reality of the move is occasionally daunting. But just as we know our Lord has the perfect home set aside for us, we know that He walks with us through the process of packing.

September 6, 2005

Good morning Lord, thank you for this weekend. It is nice to be away from the house and the moving for a while. The process is disturbing and sometimes overwhelming. I am tired of the whole thing. I would like to be moved and settled into our new home. My whole world is upside down. But Lord, You are constant, never changing bedrock beneath my feet. Sometimes I need to dig through the shifting sand of my life to reach that bedrock, but the sand is only temporary from the storms and complications of life. The season of storms is almost over and the sand and debris from daily winds is easily swept away.

Help us, Lord to build tents -- we are only pilgrims here. Our home is temporary at best. You have called Ralph and me to a season of tents, to live without the weight of houses of mortar and stone. Let us rejoice in this season.  Give us the grace and strength to clear away the stuff we have collected through the years. Please, Lord, give us discernment to weed through our possessions and take what is necessary and leave behind (actually, probably trash or give away) those things that are not essential to our new life.

Two years ago, I believe our Abba Father told me that I was in a "season of tents". I realized that although we currently rented a house, we should be living as if it were a tent. The tents the Israelites lived in, in the desert, were not like the tents we camp with today. Nor were they houses of mortar and stone built to last a lifetime.

I was taking the beautiful nomadic life God has blessed me with and filling my tent with material stuff. The walls of my tent were lined with books and things (mostly useless things) that I had collected through the years. Somehow those walls of things make me feel more secure than the peaceful, graceful lines of the tent.

My peace and joy is in You, Abba Father, not in the world around me. These possessions make it harder to do the things God calls me to do. Either I am cleaning and straightening, or listless and depressed -- because those things need to be attended to, and I have neither the energy or the time. Lord, once again I pray for wisdom, discernment and energy to clean and sort through the odds and ends of treasures and trash collected through a lifetime.

During our search through trash and treasures today I found a journal entry I wrote while we were in Maine. Our family lived in Maine as a part of a church planting mission team from Trinity Covenant Church. We were in Maine from 1989 through 1993.

I have not followed thee with abandon, only to the depths that did not cost my will. As I search my sacrifice, missing are the things I am not sure I can do without. Or, I lay them down on the alter to be consumed by Your fire, snatching them up at the final moment with fire-stained hands. Many the time I have come to You crying in pain and self-pity, holding these precious scorched possessions of mine (my time, my need for control, my pain, my frustrations and anger). You are my Father, You have picked me up and held me. You have gently scolded me, but You would not make me obey.

P.S. -- September 12, 2005:  Dear Lord, I thank You that I have fewer burns and bruises on my fingers these days. But I would not trade this process for anything. I live to love You more.

August 9, 2005

But He was wounded for our transgressions, He was bruised for our guilt and iniquities; the chastisement [needful to obtain] peace and well-being for us was upon Him, and with His stripes [that wounded] Him we are healed and made whole.   -- Isaiah 53:5 (Amplified Bible)

Good morning Lord!

Thank you for loving me, even when I find myself unlovable.

Your presence here reminds me that I am a wanted child of the living God, King of the Universe, not a woman who the Father must put up with, tolerated because I (mostly) say and do the right things. I am a woman who the Father chose to create before the beginning of time. Although Christ died on the Cross over two thousand years ago, sadly yet awesomely my sins, both great and small, were a part of the weight He bore. The scourging (whipping) He endured was also for my sicknesses, my pain, in the here and now. Although He bore that pain over two thousand years ago, Isaiah first wrote of it hundreds of years before.  Before Jesus went to the Cross, He counted the cost, considered the pain and died with the weight of the sin of the world of His shoulders -- and still considered us (and me) worthy of all His love, life and passion.

Dearest Lord Jesus, You who are worthy of ever so much more than I can ever be, I offer all that You created me to be, for the sacrifice You gave, because You first loved me.

June 16, 2005